Before taking your first sip, you feast with your eye. The rich red color Campari adds to your Negroni, the crazy garnishes of Bloody Mary and the creamy texture of your holiday Egg Nog are all a cocktail’s way of making your mouth water and saying “Drink me now.” Most of the time, the drinker’s happy to oblige.
However, the art of making appetizing cocktails is not something you’re just born with. or every photo-ready drink, there’s another that may have asking your bartender what’s on tap.
Either overwhelmingly sweet, comically savory or just downright bizarre, these are drinks that, to put it politely, only a mother would love. Bless their hearts.
Although this cocktail is described as delicious, we’re having a hard time rushing to gulp down any concoction called Alligator Sperm. This drink consists of pineapple juice, a touch of cream and Midori, which results in the bright green color that inspired the name. We’re willing to give an A+ for creativity, but this drink can stay behind the bar, thank you very much. Get the recipe.
We’re not saying Yoda is an Adonis-type, but this cocktail does him no service. The Giggling Yoda is a blended drink comprising chopped pears, vodka, lime juice, green grapes and mint. What sounds like a combination of tasty ingredients are blended up and topped with ginger ale to resemble a swampy, bubbly sludge. Drink up? Get the recipe.
There is nothing wrong with elaborate garnishes. (You could even make your own.) But isn’t there something about fried chicken dangling in your cocktail that makes you think “No, thank you?” The Fried Chicken and Watermelon ruins a tasty watermelon twist on a Whiskey Sour by adding a piece of fried, buttermilk-coated chicken skin that takes nearly a day to prepare and an hour to cook. Let’s keep that chicken on those dinner plates, people. Get the recipe.
When it comes to bringing joy to the hearts of millions, few have done a job greater than the bacon slice. Thin, thick, baked or burnt, everyone has a preference for the best ways this heaven slab can be prepared. Perhaps there’s a reason so few have said “with my vodka” (there is a notable exception). A three-ingredient cocktail made of apple juice, butterscotch schnapps and bacon-infused vodka, the Bacon Martini proves that maybe bacon can’t be used for everything. Get the recipe.
Sweet tooths, get ready to earn your title. The Lucky Charms Martini packs rock candy, marshmallow vodka and half & half into a glass rimmed and topped with the namesake cereal. This cocktail should come with a complimentary dentist appointment. Get the recipe.
Savory cocktails are getting more popular than ever and for good reason. However, with shrimp pickling liquid—a key ingredient in this cocktail, a line has been crossed. There’s nothing wrong with forgoing a sweet sipper, but let’s stick to having cocktails that complement our foods rather than replace them. Get the recipe.